THE Perfect Guacamole Recipe

Recipes, Uncategorized / Friday, August 4th, 2017

I brag on my husband a lot. His talents are wide-spread and I have yet to find one that doesn’t impress me (well… the whole beer guzzling thing has gotten pretty old…). Little did I know, when I married this fella that I would find someone who not only turned me on to guacamole, but ALSO can make the Most. Amazing. Guacamole. Ever.

Isn’t that cute? The little period between words thing… I think it’s cute.

Before Evan (the guacamole king), I wouldn’t touch guacamole. My mom once said it was bat shit and that kinda stuck with me… You gotta watch what you say around me when it comes to food. Someone once told me raisins were dead flies and I have yet to touch one since (serious vom in my mouth when I think of raisins). ANYWAY… Guacamole! I don’t remember exactly how he convinced me to try his very own bat shit recipe… but I did and I AM IN LOVE.

Side note: the guacamole king did not teach himself this recipe. An ex-girlfriend taught him how to make guac and the recipe has evolved since. Ask me if I care, I fucking dare you. Because… nope…. zero fucks given. Girlfriend (well, ex-girlfriend… lolz) did him AND me a favor. Like literally. This recipe has nursed me back to health after several hangovers AND helped me survive months eight and nine of pregnancy. It’s epic… I’m not lying.

So, without further ado (I love saying that… and I looked up the meaning of that saying. It means without further fuss or delay, HA! Not sure why that’s funny to me but it is.)….

The Perfect Guacamole Recipe

Serving Size: 2 extremely hungover adults, or like 4-6 peeps that just need a lil summin summin to snack on.

What You Need:

4-5 Medium Sized Ripe Avocados

1/2 Tbsp. Minced Garlic

2 Tbsp. Lime Juice

1/2 tsp. Cumin

1/2 tsp. Chili Powder

1/2 tsp. Paprika

Salt and Pepper to taste

1/4 C. Pico de Gallo (optional)



Cut the avocados in half. Remove the peels and pits and discard them. Place avocados in a bowl and mash until desired consistency. I like my guac mainly smooth with some lumps. We like to use a potato masher to do this… it seriously makes things so much easier.

Stir in remaining ingredients until well blended.

Serve with your fav tortilla chips (Evan and I are currently obsessed with the On The Border Tortilla Chips) and if you’re feeling a lil froggy… pour yourself a nice margarita!





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